When God Has Other Plans

Dear god,
I’m hurt and confused. I’ve never prayed so much and so hard for the baby I lost. Why didn’t you save it? Lord I followed your faith principles, I prayed and believed. You said faith moves mountains yet the baby still died. I spoke life and health over the baby. I’ve envisioned it’s life filled with your presence. I prayed for it to have a heart that knew you. I prayed for it to grow up loving and worshiping you. Yet it still died. Why lord? Why? Where are you? What are you doing?

I put my hope and trust in you; please show me my mistakes. Forgive me if I have sinned against you. Help me see how you are helping me in this situation. Father in the past you always made everything turn out ok. Why isn’t this happening in my pregnancies? Jesus my heart is down cast. My hope is diminishing. I’m afraid. Miscarriages are tough. They are tough from the grief, from the physical pain and from the mental pressure they cause. Lord what is the truth?

My dearest Dalia,
I’m doing something amazing in you. What is it that you want me to do for you?

Lord,
I want you to give me enough strength to handle my life. Make me strong so I can be a great mom, spouse and employee. I’ve been tired lord. Please take that away.

My daughter,
Trust me. Most of your problems can be resolved if you relax and stop worrying. I gave you life so you can live. Live Dalia. Enjoy my blessings. I’m still with you. I heard every prayer and I’ve collected every tear. I will see you through this if you seek me with all your heart.

Dear God

Dear God,
I’m sad Jesus. Just sad. I want to cry and cry and cry. I’m trying so hard to hold on to you. Yet it’s hard. I’m slipping. I’m hurt over what’s happening to me and now I’m hurting over what is going on in the world: violence, crime, wars, etc. Why lord? This makes me want to have nothing to do with you. All the pain and hurt, for what? There’s no love here and there’s no joy.

My Dearest Dalia,
I know there’s pain here and I know you think I’m distant or am not involved. Just because the outcome is not what you want doesn’t mean I don’t love you or want to help you. By the way you couldn’t be more wrong about this world being a bad place. There’s more good going on then you can see. There are wonderful things taking place right now. And yet you may never know about them or hear of them.

When I made you it was for a great cause. One person can make the world better or worse. You decide. Who will you be? Will you make a difference? Will you intervene? Will you trust me?

Seeking God

O papa, my heart is torn. All I want to do is cry. I feel so sorry for myself. I don’t want to go to work and I don’t want to see pregnant women. How many times did I see them only to hope that one day I will be like them and it never happened! Why do you think I can handle this lord? I don’t see where you are in my pain.

My Dearest Dalia,
I have never let you out of my sight. I know all about your situation. I didn’t forget you and I’m not distant. I have a good plan for your future. Trust me. Walk by faith not by sight. Those who wait on me will see my glory. I am closer to you than you think. I have given you tears to express your feelings. Go ahead and don’t deny your emotions, they are part of the healing process. I want you to live moment by moment. Give me thanks for everything, even small things. Talk to me throughout the day. Ask me for advice, opinions and so on. Take me as your life’s partner. Together we will do amazing things. Dalia, trust me.